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Have you ever tried to talk to a group of friends about the television shows or movies in your childhood that shaped your life? You know... when everyone is reminiscing about their favorite parts and lines, and you decide to make the confession of a lifetime. You decide to share the one movie that touched your soul and gave you guidance through the years. And as you reveal your hidden love for this cinematic classic you begin to glance around the room, slowly realizing that not only has no one ever heard of this movie but to make matters worse they think you made it up. To free all of you from that awkward moment of self-mortification I have decide to expose my list of the greatest movies of all time that no one has ever seen.
My Science Project (1985) is one of those movies with science fi, teenage angst, love, social struggles, and a helping of Miyagi mentorship on top. It begins with a normal high school dilemma: Michael Harlan (John Stockwell) and his Cousin-Vinny-esq best friend (the oh-so-fabulous Fisher Stevens at his finest) are from the wrong side of the tracks (if they weren't it wouldn't be right). To pass the semester and hold on to the love of their hippie dippy science teacher (Dennis Hopper) they have to ace their science project. So in true bad kid fashion they decide to break into an abandoned aircraft carrier lot (kinda like the one in "Can't Buy Me Love" but more ominous) and look for something "sciencey" to hand in. Their prayers are answered. Stumbling upon a cool contraption, they pack it up and decide to hand it in. It turns out that the device they found is a time portal that allows the past and the present to temporarily merge. This is all in the first half an hour, and let me tell you it only gets better. The kids are forced to battle aliens from the future, Vietcong, and other time-trapped nasties that are running rampant through their high school. And they have to figure out how to save the nerdy love interest and the universe. Needless to say, stuff gets outta control.
On the flip side is Ladyhawke, (1985) a classic medieval tale with a comedic twist. Philipe Gastone (a pre-Ferris Matthew Broderick) is a local thief who has broken out of the inescapable castle prison of Aquila. As an army tracks Philipe down, the robustly handsome former captain of the guard Etienne Navarre (a young and moderately attractive Rutger Hauer) comes to his rescue fighting off the soldiers. Navarre, accompanied by his preternaturally smart hawk (hint, hint) is being hunted by the bishop who he in return seeks to kill. Since Philipe knows the secret passages of the castle, he becomes Navarre's unwilling guide back to Aquila. As their journey unfolds we find out Navarre is in love with local beauty Isabeau (the majestic Michelle Pfeiffer), yet their love is doomed. Literally. The Bishop, who also coveted Isabeau, cursed the lovers in a jealous rage. During the day Isabeau is hawk, and at night while she is a human Navarre is a wolf. Ladyhawke dabbles in medieval religious freakiness, with great battle scenes, and a sprinkling of '80s Broderick humor... yeah, you know you want it! If you are able to respect Tremors as an unappreciated '90s classic (which by the way it is) you will appreciate these diamonds in the rough. But to experience the love and power of these hidden gems you will have to check them out yourself. Before you do, print out this page, which includes photos of the DVDs, and links to them on Amazon. That way, if anyone ever tries to say you made these movies up, you'll have Popcrazy proof that you're telling the truth.
--TracyMcNeil
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